Starting Over, My ASS

My mother gave me this huge speech about how we should both just start over with each other. That was several months ago.

Today I found an apartment that I thought would be good. Actually, I found it yesterday, but brought a friend back with me today to help me make a decision. They wanted me to fill out an application, and could hold the apartment for 24 hours.

You have to earn three times the total cost of the rent (for a year, not a month). So if rent is $1,000 per month, you have to earn $36,000 per year. When I filled out the application, the leasing agent told me that because I don't have a roommate yet (though I WILL have one if I get a two-bedroom/two-bathroom), instead of having to pay the mini $199 deposit, I would probably have to pay a full month of rent as a deposit.

That's fine; I have savings. But no. Despite the fact that I have a solid chunk of money in savings (six months worth), and a Roth IRA, and a solid job that I've been at for over a year, I do not quality by myself.

There's the 24 hour hold going on right now. I have until noon tomorrow (that's Monday) to get either a money-earning roommate, or a co-signer.

We all know there's no way in hell I can get a roommate by tomorrow. And who's going to co-sign for me? Sure, I have friends, but I'd barely be comfortable asking for a glass of water in their house. The husband I don't have? The boyfriend I don't have? That leaves my parents or my brother.

Tonight I called my parents. I explain what's going on with the apartment and end with "So I have until tomorrow at noon to get someone to co-sign." And my mother's response is "Oh well. I'm sure you'll find another apartment."

I ask to speak with my dad. I explain the whole thing to him, and ask if he'll co-sign. Aside from the fact that he has movers coming with his furniture to move him into a place he doesn't have keys to yet, he is willing. Except that my mother tells him no.

That's right. My mother will not co-sign a lease for me. This would not cost her any money at all. Why? My father says he thinks it stems from when I was about 19 or 20 and bounced a couple of checks.

Let's review. I'm 30. I don't even remember this bouncing of checks happening at all, but even if it did, that was 10 years ago. A decade ago. How is that starting over? It is not.

So I'm supposed to start over with her, but she doesn't have to start over with me? And she wonders why I have anger issues with her?

I called my brother after I got off the phone with my parents. He is willing to co-sign. Of course, he will be on an airplane tomorrow all day, and will not land before my noon deadline. I'm going to try to sweet-talk the leasing agent into extending my deadline.

If he won't do it, then I lose the apartment. And that will be okay. Not great, but okay. Even if I won't have the new apartment, I already have the knowledge that my brother is willing to co-sign for me. And that's worth more to me than any new apartment. Even one that allows dogs and has a basketball hoop.